I have written before about how this phase of motherhood, the period when you are a mom to young children, can be incredibly isolating, particularly if you were one of those women who had many women friends. Between work and the kids, there's no time for anything else. So weekend brunches or pedicures or movie outings have to fall by the wayside. Everyone knows it is not a permanent circumstance, but in the midst of it, you start to feel very alone. I remember watching a television show years ago where several girlfriends were talking and one of them said: You just can't rely on a man to provide you all the emotional support you need, they're not wired that way, that's why you have your girlfriends. It's true. In the absence of time with dear friends, your emotional well being can get a little shaky.
I have been blessed to have always had a lot of girlfriends. I've had friends on boards with me, friends through bible studies, friends through working out, friends through young professionals groups, etc. I struggled selecting a small wedding party (though I did do it). I had TWO thirtieth birthday parties because my friends were so precious to help me through being bummed about that milestone (silly now, I know). I had five baby showers because of the unbelievable outpouring by girlfriends from Houston to Fort Worth and from church to work. But once the babies arrived, my time and attention (rightfully so) was diverted exclusively. Then, once I returned to work, every moment I had outside of the office I felt had to be devoted to the children and Bray. Again, this is not a bad thing, but I felt alone. I still had girlfriends, but there was no time to interact. Out of all those girlfriends, there are a handful that I could call day or night who would stop what they were doing and rush to help me or support me or just have a cup of coffee. I am truly blessed to have these women because not everyone has such a priceless gift.
But there is one woman who has seen the good, the bad, the ugly, and the totally wacky, and loves and supports me regardless of whether I deserve it. In an open-the-heavens, rain-down-blessings, turn of events, I have seen her three times over the past few weeks and enjoyed some serious quality time. We had dinner a couple weeks ago. We went shopping a week ago. Then we had brunch and pedicures for my birthday. She is the most faithful friend one could possibly conjure up. After a summer with very limited visits, these past few weeks have been a gift for my parched and aching soul. She knows exactly what to say. She knows when we need to talk about serious stuff so she can be such a support, but she also knows when we just need to be funny and zany and girly. So this is my thank you card to my dearest and most precious of friends. God's gift to me presented with a big red bow on it. And let me encourage you that if you are in one of these stages, an isolating period because of young kids or aging parents or other life circumstance, give your spirit a lift and meet your dearest friend for a cup of coffee or a late night dessert. I'm telling you, it will refill your tank to get you through the next leg of your journey. I feel like I could go for miles and miles now.
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