Tuesday, March 15, 2011

The Funk

I'm in a funk.  I haven't written because I'm in a funk.  It's hard to be witty or prolific in a funk.  It doesn't help that I am in serious sleep deprivation. The kids must be going through some terrible teething or separation anxiety becase they, really just the boys, are waking in the middle of the night & staying awake.  FOR HOURS.  The night before last they were up from 12:30 am to 4 am.  I'm in a non-functioning funk. 

I've been writing about waiting.  I feel like God is on the cusp of this big thing in my life and I am not known for my patience.  I'm tired of waiting and I feel like I can't move forward or backwards so I'm caught in between what is and what will be.  And I'm just plain tired. 

I'm in a world right now where I have two faces.  On the outside, everyone keeps saying "how do you do it?", "you're amazing," "you've got it all together," and on the inside I feel tired and stuck and overwhelmed and behind on everything that needs to get done. 

Fortunately, God has words for those of us feeling forelorn, overwhelmed, in a funk.  I pray they will sink into my soul today, and yours, and help spring me from this funk:

Psalm 13 - How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?  How long must I wrestle with my thoughts?  Look on me and answer, LORD my God. Give light to my eyes... But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the LORD’s praise, for he has been good to me.

Psalm 16 - LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.  I keep my eyes always on the LORD. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.  Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay. You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

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